about me & my mom 

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(Meeting my Mom for the first time in an orphanage in Kyiv, Ukraine.)

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My name is Jessica, and I am the adopted daughter of a deeply loved and dearly missed Mom who passed away from Stage 4 Metastatic Breast Cancer in February 2023. Her diagnosis, after being cancer-free for two decades, was a devastating shock. Despite her tireless fight and endless bravery, her body couldn’t keep up with her resilient spirit. Her love and positive impact touched countless lives, including family, friends, students, and her medical team. Her legacy of unconditional love and kindness lives on in our memories and hearts, and she will forever be a part of us.

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After my mom’s passing, I experienced varied waves of grief, but I also recognized how fortunate I was—though it took time to acknowledge this without dismissing my own sadness. Having endured three years of anticipatory grief, I felt lucky to have had certain privileges that many do not.

 

I was able to honor her wishes by staying by her side throughout her journey and ensuring she could pass at home rather than in a hospital or facility. Because she asked me to stay home, I spent every day with her, fully aware that each moment could be our last. This time allowed me to say everything I needed and wanted to say, too.

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While her loss will always hurt, I find comfort in knowing I could be there for her in every way possible. This perspective doesn’t erase the pain, but it softens it, allowing me to grieve with a little more peace than I thought possible.

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Through grief therapy, time off work, reading books on grief, and engaging in online grief communities, I discovered a deep draw to the field of grief and loss. While I will always carry the sadness of my mom’s absence, I continue to feel her love and light in my life.

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Writing about grief has become a meaningful outlet for me. I hope that by sharing my thoughts on this difficult journey, I can provide comfort to someone else, even if it’s just one person. And if this blog becomes nothing more than me sharing into the vastness of the internet, that’s okay too—because this process helps me heal.

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Thank you for visiting my blog and taking the time to read my words. I hope they bring you some comfort on your journey. Remember, you are not alone, your feelings are valid, and there isn't a timeline for grief.

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Grieving a loved one is a lifelong process, but I hope that, in time, your days will be filled with more fond memories and smiles. It’s okay if some days are harder than others—that’s all part of the journey, and you’re doing your best.

 

If you’re struggling, I encourage you to seek support from a grief therapist. For immediate help, call 911 or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.

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